Berzerker in memoriam


This morning Tom Bean’s dog Pinto killed Berzerker in the far corner of the basement where B had sought refuge under boards and wire and other material. Tom said Pinto hated cats and had killed two already after once being scratched on the face by a cat. When I found B he looked fine, eyes open etc. But he was already a little cold, only five minutes after his last plaintive miaow. I wonder if he had died of shock – he still seemed in one piece. I attach a post mortem image, scarily bright. I can only imagine the snakes, the squirrels, the mice, the birds, the moths, the lizards all celebrating tonight at the demise of the Feline Stalker* But he was MY small animal killer, and my friend, and I will miss him.

Yesterday, I went to see the goats, still reduced in numbers from 13 to 10! Where was Zip? He was over by the shelter on the left of the lake, where the goats often hang out* When I got close to him, he ran off to join the goats. I found one dead goat, middle-sized, exuding a noxious stench. This morning I went looking for a saw-mill, and found again Robinson’s mill. Could not help recalling meeting Mr Robinson, still bent double after a childhood accident in which a tree had fallen on him and broken his body. What revenge to have started a sawmill. Anyway he subsequently died, and his mill is now just a buyer of timber.

Steely Dan Thoreau, my not-very-feral barn cat, wants to be with me, even waiting on the bank plaintively while I swim* Two ‘moral’ dilemmas: 1. Can I bring him down from the barn to the house so soon after B’s demise? Would that not disrespect the memory of Mr B? 2. Should I really separate him from his companion/brother? Should I bring both or neither? I could bring both, and then get more feral cats (always in need of a home).

I am worried I am getting immured to death as it is happening all around me. At 9am Berzerker was stretched out next to my laptop, interfering with my hand on my mouse. At 9:30am he was gone, saved at least from terror, furry but getting cold. RIP Mr B